I take Caleb to the library once a week. We catch the bus because Shane takes the truck to work. This is usually not a problem because unlike going to Georgetown, the bus going home is usually on time. I realized when we got to the library that we probably should have stayed home. I was feeling really tired and snappy. I’m used to Caleb saying “Mommy? (enter random question)” every 2 minutes or so, and usually deal with it politely.
Not so today. I was getting peeved. Deep breaths. Ok, so we get through the library excursion and are on our way to the bus stop. I forgot to mention it was really cold and windy (in the upper 20’s but more like teens with the wind chill).
Did you hear me? WINDY! Which makes the cold a million times worse. As we’re walking to the bus stop, I see the bus pass by. We’re way too far off to run, so we missed it. We had to sit out in the cold for 20 minutes. So, we’re freezing our booties off at the bus stop. Caleb is practically crying because he’s so cold and I’m just miserable. I was thinking about how I hate living in a cold place. And about how we’re probably going to be here for another 10 years because Shane can’t get transferred out of here. And about how I feel so pressured to be happy with the situation, even though I’m totally miserable about it. And about how I wish we hadn’t sold my car, thinking that we were surely going to move to the West coast anyway. And so, right there at the bus stop, I started crying. I didn’t even care that people driving by probably thought I was crazy. It wasn’t until I saw that poor Caleb was so concerned that I managed to stop myself.
I mean, that’s ridiculous, right? It’s gotta be the hormones. It’s not that bad. Although, it’s much easier to realize that sitting in a warm apartment with the fireplace going.
I think most of my emotional episodes with Caleb are funny. But this one not so much.